My wife and I talked quite a bit while away on vacation. It is so nice to be able to discuss things even slightly out of the fray. What is going on in our lives, what does the future hold, how do we see things going with our community? We talked about our dreams, and our hopes, we talked about our concerns. But one thing we wrestled with was the whole idea of our public persona and social media.
I tend to live very publicly, I share too freely at times, and am very open about everything. I think that is good in most ways, especially sharing my own doubts and frailties. But what about Jesus admonition to pray in secret, to do your good works in secret? What about Paul saying love doesn't parade itself? How does that effect facebook? Twitter? this blog?
Yesterday I was studying a passage of scripture with my daughters and they both pointed out how public the church seemed to function in its beginnings. Jesus also said "let your light so shine so that men will see your good works and glorify your Father in heaven.
So what do we do? Our community has no name, no website and no formal leadership, mission statement or building. I have a blog, and post bible study videos once and a while. We have an open dinner and bible study time but don't advertise it, and are hesitant to invite people until they are in relationship with us. We could use a few more people in our community. I long for a house (preferably donated) that can serve as a house of hospitality, a community gathering place, with a garden and maybe even a small hermitage. Do I court donations and get attention? Just heard a video of Patch Adams talking about how he got famous in the hopes he could build his hospital and has spent twenty years being a celebrity and just now broke ground.
Whats the answer? How the hell should I know? We are trying to live day by day, being faithful to what we have now. Maybe I will do less online stuff, maybe more. Maybe we will do a bit more public stuff with our community, maybe we will stay as the mustard seed a bit longer before we really sprout. I just know the wrestling, the doubt, the struggle is all good, and what keeps us depending upon God and each other.